Charlie Hartwell - Vision Coach

September 3, 2008

The following is from "The Daily OM" which is a website that sends out great and sometimes very appropriate messages to it's subscribers on a daily basis.

"Freeing Up Energy, Healing What Hurts,

Many of us are going through our lives aware of a well of pain underlying our daily awareness that we'’ve felt for so long, we aren'’t even sure where it comes from. It almost seems as if it’s part of who we are, or the way we see the world, but it’s important to realize that this pain is something that needs to be acknowledged and processed. The longer we sit on it, the harder it is to work through, and the more likely it is that we will be forced to acknowledge it as it makes itself known to us in ways we can’t predict. Rather than waiting for this to happen, we can empower ourselves by identifying the pain and resolving to take action toward healing it.

The very thought of this brings up feelings of resistance in most of us, especially if, on the surface, our lives seem to be in order. It’s difficult to dig up the past and go into it unless we are being seriously inconvenienced by the hurt. The thing is, when we are carrying the burden of our unprocessed pain, sooner or later, it will inconvenience us. If we can be brave and proactive, we can save ourselves a lot of future suffering and free up the energy that is tied up in keeping the pain down.

There are many ways to do this, but the first step is to recognize the pain and honor it by moving our awareness into it. In this process, even if it’s just five minutes during meditation, we will begin to have a sense of what the pain is made of. It might be fear of abandonment, childhood abuse, anger at being mistreated, or some other long held wound. As we sit with the pain, we will also have a sense of whether we can deal with it by ourselves, or not. It may be time to work with a counselor, or form a healing circle with close friends. Whatever path you choose, resolve to go deep into the pain, so that you can release it fully, and set yourself free. Remember, it is never too late in life to heal what hurts, and there is never a better time than now."

June 12

I'd like to share today's message from the Daily OM - every day they have a daily message they send out by e-mail. Many times I find it's just the perfect message for the day, just what I needed.

Life Transitions

The Death And Rebirth Of Self

Sometimes a part of us must die before another part can come to life. Even though this is a natural and necessary part of our growth, it is often painful or, if we don’t realize what’s happening, confusing and disorienting. In fact, confusion and disorientation are often the messengers that tell us a shift is taking place within us. These shifts happen throughout the lives of all humans, as we move from infancy to childhood to adolescence and beyond. With each transition from one phase to another, we find ourselves saying good-bye to an old friend, the identity that we formed in order to move through that particular time.

Sometimes we form these identities in relationships or jobs, and when we shift those areas of our life become unsettled. Usually, if we take the time to look into the changing surface of things, we will find that a shift is taking place within us. For example, we may go through one whole chapter of our lives creating a protective shell around ourselves because we need it in order to heal from some early trauma. One day, though, we may find ourselves feeling confined and restless, wanting to move outside the shelter we needed for so long; the new part of ourselves cannot be born within the confines of the shell our old self needed to survive.

We may feel a strange mixture of exhilaration and sadness as we say good-bye to a part of ourselves that is dying and make way for a whole new identity to emerge in its place. We may find inspiration in working with the image of an animal who molts or sheds in order to make way for new skin, fur, or feathers to emerge. For example, keeping a duck feather, or some other symbol of transformation, can remind us that death and rebirth are simply nature’s way of evolving. We can surrender to this process, letting go of our past self with great love and gratitude, and welcoming the new with an open mind and heart, ready for our next phase of life.

AFRICAN GIFTS AND ANGELS

December 15, 2007

In a township on the outskirts of Capetown, South Africa, a woman named Eunice prayed to God for an angel to help her as she began a journey from South Africa to the United States. It was her first visit to America, and she was nervous about all the logistics of flight changes, passport control, getting to her destination.

In Minneapolis, three weeks prior, in an office near the Mississippi river, an energy healer told a 44 year old man that he was going to receive a gift on his trip to South Africa. It confirmed a strong intuitive he'd experienced the day before.

My last update was about the floods, devestation, gifts and beauty of my friend's wedding in Plettenburg Bay, South Africa. After the wedding, during the drive to the airport in George, South Africa, I (the 44 year old man) began thinking about that gift that had been spoken about before leaving for Africa. I try to live my life without any expectations, so there had been little focus on the gift, only an awareness to be looking for it. Nothing had stuck out during the trip, except the floods (which I felt were a gift to my friend and his bride). Perhaps the gift had already been given but had escaped me.

On the plane from Johannesburg to Dakar, Senegal, I sat next to an African woman - Eunice Mlotywa. We said hello, and midway through the flight asked each other where we were headed. Remarkably, this woman from the townships in Cape Town was headed to the cold frozen north of the U.S., to Minneapolis. A remarkable coincidence.

We talked about why she was coming to the U.S., a little about what she did. I knew quickly there was a special energy to Eunice.
She'd never been to the U.S., and had only been out of South Africa once. She asked for help with her customs documents. It was apparent she was a bit hesitant about going through passport control and switching flights. I offered to help her to ensure she got through customs and passport control in Atlanta, as well as ensuring her bags would be transferred to the flight to Minneapolis. It's remarkably complex for a non-seasoned traveler to go through the process immigration and switching to a domestic flight.

After the confusion, I offered to buy Eunice breakfast at the Atlanta airport as we waited for our flight together. She began to tell me about her business, which was all about empowering women in her township in order to promote and sustain the quality of lives in vulnerable groups. Her vision had helped 500 women to become self-sufficient through beadwork projects that they could work on at home. Eunice believes that unless women earn an income and become self-sustainable, they will forever be trapped in a vicious cycle of abuse and poverty.

As she was talking about this, it resonated so deeply. My belief is that when the power of the feminine rises and comes into full balance in Africa, the continent will be completely healed. As will we all. Earth will be free of so many problems. Eunice's vision is actually help make this happen.

I played her my song "Africa Rising" (coming out soon) - and the synchronicity of our meeting may have led to my finding a local Xhosa band to record a version of my song in their language.

That's all fodder for another story. This one is about a gift.

Eunice gave me a brochure of the Iliwa Laphakade Women's Empowermet Project. In it, she mentioned one of her partners was Curious Chameleon, which is the business of my friend Michael who's wedding I'd just attended.

In a country of 20 million people (I know about six of them), I'd met a woman from a town ship who was a very close friend of my best friend from college. She's prayed for an angel to help her get to Minnesota. I was that angel. I'd been promised a gift, which turned out to be an angel in the form of Eunice. I organized her ride when she got to the Twin Cities, who dropped me off at my house.

I hugged Eunice and smiled at a Universe that answers prayers in the most remarkable ways, and creates scenarios that are truly spectacular. Eunice was my gift of the season.

November 27, 2007

THE LESSONS OF DISASTERS

Yesterday, I returned from an incredible wedding in South Africa. It was one of the more memorable weddings I've ever attended. My experience left me literally "flooded" with life lessons.

First, the background. This wedding had been in the works for two years. It ended up being planned three different times. It was postponed for a year because of a death in the family. Given that the bride and groom wanted their friends from around the world to be able to attend, they put it off for a year until this Thanksgiving.

The wedding was held in Plettenburg Bay, South Africa, a wonderful city right on the coast of the Indian Ocean. Spectacular backdrop. Beautiful country surrounded by mountains, cliffs, beaches, colorful birds, rivers, farms. It was planned at a time that was spring in South Africa, a time of year when the weather would be almost "guaranteed" to be spectacular and sunny.

After a 36 hour trip, I finally arrived in the city of George, South Africa to rent a car and drive to "Plett." When I left the airport, driving on the wrong side of the road, it was raining a bit. I didn't know it had been raining for a few days. When I arrived at the house where I was staying, the rain began to pick up steadily. I went to lunch at a Mozambique themed restaurant where I met friends, and later the bride and groom. At the time there was beginning to be some concern about the location of the restaurant where we were to have the bridal dinner (On Thanksgiving Night). I didn't think it was a big deal.

And then all hell broke loose.

The rain began to come down in earnest. The road to the bridal dinner place was washed out. They cancelled the bridal dinner. And switched to having an event at a local restaurant - more of just a gathering. The rain began to come in sheets. Three hours after we left dinner, there were helicopters flying to the area where the dinner was held to evacuate the residents. As we drove that night we could see houses, cars, farms under water. The river outside of our house was foaming, frothing: enormous old trees that had been sitting on the riverbed upstream for decades were floating past our house. Houseboats that came off their moorings were shooting down the river, to be dashed later by the sea.

450 homes in the area we were in were evacuated. My friends had planned their wedding at a time and place which turned into a huge natural disaster in South Africa. The owner of the house we were staying at was concerned we would be evacuated. The interstate highway closed. Wedding guests could not get in, many of those that did had to stay in different places because their hotels could not be reached.

Every event of the wedding was canceled, or re-planned, or held in a different location. A bridal dinner turned into a bridal lunch in someone's basement. We toasted the bride and groom around a pool table.

My friend and his bride are both planners. I love them dearly. They are festidious about details. This wedding had been planned to a T, with every thought and effort to create a cultural experience that would integrate cultures, religions, spirituality, people from different countries. It was a meticulous affair. And it all went awry. They had to completely rework the wedding on the fly.

One could take all that happened and be really negative about it. My friend and his bride really opened themselves to a different place. There was a lesson in the flood. For two people who like to be in control, the universe threw them a curve ball (or in South Africa cricket a sidewinder).
Many believe that we are in control of our lives. And when we realize we are not, we can really grow. My friends, despite all the possibilities to blame and be angry at the weather, despite all their planning, quickly realized this wedding was not about plans coming together, but about people coming together. Out of love. No one gave a darn about the weather, what we all cared about was love. We were there to love them and support their union. They were given this remarkable opportunity at the beginning of their marriage to surrender their own agenda to a power higher than themselves. There was really no other choice except to cry tears into the flood. But they took on the task and allowed the unfolding to occur. At one point, when the bride was having a hard time giving up a life dream of having the ceremony on the family farm (unaccessible and too wet to put down a tent), she reported that her deceased mother came to her and told her to just let go. She did, and they found the most beautiful restaurant in town which accommodated their wedding with 24 hour notice and provided an amazing backdrop for a multi-cultural wedding with beautiful Jewish traditions, combined with African music, threaded together with spiritual themes about the beauty of nature and the power of the light that is within all of us.
If we live our life with expectations, we will be sorely disappointed. Almost every time. If set intentions and do our best to plan, but to be open to a higher power, we can be enriched beyond measure. There are such gifts available to us if we are just listening. Sometimes the message comes through a natural disaster. Sometimes it comes in a flower blooming right before our eyes.

Soon, I will be releasing a song called Africa Rising. This was my 10th trip to the continent, which never ceases to surprise me. Africa provided another opportunity for remarkable lessons and growth. This time, we found love rising in the midst of a national disaster.

November 14th

WHAT IS CARETAKING?

I'd like to share some wisdom from my mentor and friend, Lyndall Johnson, about care-taking. I want to acknowledge Lyndall and how her wisdom has helped me. For anyone seeking to transform, it's essential to have support - people who can hold for you along your journey, ask great questions. Lyndall has never had one answer for my life, although she has pointed out things that she has seen that might be helpful. The greatest gift a mentor can give are questions.

What is Caretaking - by Lyndall Johnson (copyright 1995 and used with permission)

1. Behavior - Caretaking is behavior that is very often mistaken as caring and loving behavior towards another person because it looks as if it is caring and loving. However, it is a masquerade, a charade, a sham and a cheap mimic of true love. It takes the form of advice giving, controlling, lecturing, fixing, rescuing, enabling, being manipulated into doing for others what they can do for themselves and dishonesty in communicating our true feelings and needs. Essentially it is a position of superiority over another in an attempt to protect oneself from feelings of helplessness, fear, and shame.

2. Motives
How do we differentiate between caretaking and loving if they look the same? We can do so by examining our own true motives for doing, giving, and caring for another, or for being "nice." Unfortunately, our true motives are often unconscious to ourselves and hard to discover. Some of the unconscious reasons people have for doing "kind" and "loving" things for others are:

- fear of being judged, criticized, rejected, abandoned, not liked
- fear of not being seen as "Christian," mother, neighbor, friend
- need for approval, affirmation, attention, love
- fear of feeling guilty or shameful for not being "loving."
- fear of anger and retaliation

Fear is the opposite of love. Shame limits our capacity to love ourselves and therefore others. Need results in taking not giving. This kind of giving is a closed loop that ends with ourselves. It is selfish because it serves our unconscious and hidden agenda of getting our own needs met, our own fears soothed and our own guilt assuaged.

3. Consequences

We also need to examine the consequences of our "loving behavior." Does "caring for others" take away time from our primary relationships? Does giving and volunteering result in us feeling resentful and stressed? Are these feelings inappropriately taken out on others? Is our own creativity stifled because because there is no time left for ourselves? Do others remain dependent on us and never learn to take responsibility for themselves? Do we actually help someone else stay stuck in dysfunctional behavior? Do we try to get our needs met indirectly and manipulatively instead of asking for what we want? Do other people feel guilty and beholden to us as a result of our "giving?"

Very little in life is black or white. Our motives are often a mixture of both genuine caring and caretaking. Our task, however, is to become aware of the extent to which we are motivated by fear or shame or need. Once we are aware we need to have the courage to set limits, be assertive and not allow ourselves to become victims of other people's demands and requests. In the long run, acting like a victim is detrimental and destructive to ourselves and others.

September 20, 2007

iPod

Recently, I wrote an piece on how the Universe communicates with us. The basic answer to the question raised was "How does God NOT
communicate with us?"

At the end of this summer, I found another fun, mystical, amazing way to seek Divine answers to questions or issues. Through the iPod.
As we were traveling around Lake Superior this summer, we stumbled on this idea of putting our iPods to shuffle, asking questions, and
getting remarkable answers through the songs that the Universe chose. We put the iPod song feature on shuffle, ask a question, turn
the dial on the songs until it felt right (without looking), and just be open to what came to us.

An example of this was when we were traveling to a small town in Canada - which we'd been looking forward to. We arrived in the tiny town of Wawa where we had planned to stay, but it just didn't feel right. There was something that just wasn't working for us in Wawa. The next town, however, was more than 80 miles away - and we'd been driving a lot that day. So we got into the car and asked for guidance through the iPod as to whether we should move on. We shuffled, and out came this song by Little Feat - "Willing." The song is all about a trucker - and when we got to the part that said
"I'll be willing...to be moving" we knew intuitively that was our message. So we drove on. And asked for guidance of where we shouldstay. Out comes this song I didn't even know was on my iPod called "One Monkey" by Lucinda Williams. It made no sense. Until we gotto this town Marathon and found the most amazing bed and breakfast, where amazingly there was room in the Master Suite. And hanging on the bed was a stuffed animal - One Monkey.

On another day, I asked a question about some pain I've been feeling in my side. It's an energetic wound from long ago, but I have felt the painparticularly over the past year. We spun the iPod, and landed on a song by Emmy Lou Harris. The song was so perfect. I cried many tears. It was like the song was written for me - it relayed all the kharma that has created the pain in my side, back to where the pain was established centuries ago. Through the song, I was able to dig deeply and forgive myself. The pain in my side is much better now. I am more aware of why the pain is there and it is getting better every week.

I was running this summer and just asked the Universe what I needed to move forward in certain aspects of my life. I shuffled the iPod and prepared to receive the message - which came in the form of the song "Indiana" by the Samples. I listened to the whole song seeking to get the message - there was nothing. I knew the song well. As itended, I just thought "Well, this didn't work so well" - and then at the end of the song there's this little addendum to the song - it's a very short conversation from Houston control talking to some astronaut. It said "Houston, everything's a go. We're just waiting for the...." and then the song just ends - it's only five seconds. And I started laughing hysterically. Because what the Universe was telling me was that it's only for me to BE ready. The universe is already prepared, everything is a go, it's just waiting for me..

Sometimes the messages come in the name of the song, or from one line in the song, or from a story in the song. Other times I just get thefeeling to let it ride, and allow 2-3 songs in a row to provide the wisdom I seek.

There are no right questions. Our kids asked this song about our cats on a drive to St. Louis in the middle of August. The song was called "I think they like me." It just repeated those lines over and over again during the song. We laughed at that song.

It doesn't always work, to be sure. I'd say about 15% of the time I get nothing from the songs that are chosen. Perhaps that's because I'm not listening. Or not following the intuition of where to stop as I'm circling my fingers on the iPod shuffle.

Sometimes I just ask for a song for the day. Or for inspiration. Or what's blocking me from something. Or about a relationship. Or just guidance.

The Universe gives us gifts every day, and in many ways - even through technology. I love my iPod. But using the iPod in this new way makes it even more incredible. I'm not in control of what's playing, only in the questions I'm asking. It's just allowing what is meant to come to be there - and to listen closely.

September 13th, 2007

Pedestal (continued)

My last update was about how amazing and wonderful it is to be thrown off a pedestal.
And I read Time Magazine's article about Mother Theresa over the past few days. I'll likely have more insights to share about her, but what really struck me was that within just a week of talking about being thrown off the pedestal, I found myself realizing that I had put Mother Theresa on a pedestal.

As I read the article, I realized the Catholic Church will make this woman a Saint. (I won't go into that here, either).
But as they continue to do that, I'm just going to throw her off the pedestal I held her on. Which means I need to do the same thing about Mandela, Martin Luther King, Ghandi, and anyone else I can think of.

And boy, would the world change positively if we stopped putting Jesus on a pedestal as our savior. He didn't want it, didn't ask for it, and he is no savior. We could do ourselves a world of good as well if we took our own egos off the pedestal that many of us hold for ourselves. Anytime you think you are better than anyone else, you are putting yourself on a pedestal for which surely you must ultimately be responsible for.

We're all human. It serves none of us to put people on pedestals. Yes, I have incredible respect for all of these people. I'm glad I share or have shared the Earth with people like Mother Theresa, Nelson Mandela, Martin Luther King. I am blessed by them. But they were human, just like me. They made mistakes, they had fears, some had sex scandals, some had other scandals. We all have a dark side, and it's wonderful for all of us to see Mother Theresas. Holding them up on a pedestal does not serve the work they did. Respecting them and learning from them does. They each had their own unique way of making the world a place more filled with light. Thank you to each of them and many, many more.

My gift to Mother Theresa on the 10th anniversary of her death is to take her off my pedestal. With love for her, with gratitude for how she helped people. With a knowing that she was NOT a saint, just a wonderful woman who was a product of her times, her religion, her own issues. She was ultimately human, and ultimately not. Her spirit strongly lives on, and I am feeling her particularly the last couple of weeks.

 

August 26, 2007

PEDESTAL

Last night, after eating fried pickles, cheese curds, and other assorted Minnesota State Fair goodies, I attended the Fergie concert. It was a new experience for me. At the last "big" concert I went to, people brought lighters as a way to show appreciation. Now, people just turn on the lights of their cell phones.

I didn't actually know a lot about Fergie (except that my daughter was very jealous I was going to the concert), but I was incredibly surprised by the beauty of her story and her words. One song in particular really brought awareness to something that I feel compelled to speak.
The song is called Pedestal. Order it from ITunes - it's an important song.

I am in the process of getting divorced. In my choosing to be free of my marriage, both I and the woman I love have been the topic of much discussion behind our backs. Gossip, rumor, speculation. The decision to end any marriage can be difficult, and I have not found a handbook yet on how to do it perfectly. Regardless, the decision has freed both me and my soon to be ex-wife to move on with our lives. She is a wonderful person, and a great mother to our children. And she's able to move on with her life to pursue her own path without me, and with a great partner of her own.

The harshest judge during this time was my own sibling. I have never experienced judgement like I felt from her. Some in my family allowed this to become a scandal, participated in the scandal, talked to my friends about it, spread rumors, threatened, and made my life's decision all about them.
Many friends participated in the gossip. Spread rumors about things they knew nothing about. Talked behind my back (without asking me for the truth). One old friend told me she'd received 15 calls in a day from women - she sort of became a gatekeeper of the gossip. I learned women can be very tribal. Many banded together, took sides, blamed, speculated, made the divorce a topic of rampant discussion in the community, at our children's school, in social settings. They never talked to me - only to each other.

And then there were the few who just sat with no judgement, supporting and loving both my former wife and me, without any need to participate in the judgement and the speculation. These are true friends.

While this experience was incredibly difficult, it has also been wonderful. I sat for many years on a pedestal. A pedestal of what many told me was a perfect marriage. A pedestal of what people thought I was. It's what Fergie was talking about. And thank God I'm now off the pedestal. Because it's so much more free to just be an ass than it is to be put on a pedestal. Anthony de Mello talked about this in his book "Awareness." He spoke to how freeing it was to respond to people who might judge him and replied. "What would you expect from an ass?"

I thank the stars that I'm not on anyone's pedestal anymore. I'm just an ass, and I'm free. And I don't have to live to anyone's expectations anymore.
But I have some questions for those who participated in the riot. I don't judge you for what you said about me, but I see you much more clearly now. Judgement is self-hatred. It's your shit, not mine. I'm just an ass, remember?

Here are my questions

1) What did you receive in exchange for the rumors you spread?
2) Who are you to know one damn thing about my marriage besides what you made it to be, and the pedestal you put it on?
3) Was this all a smokescreen so that you did not need to look at your own issues? It's easy not to blame others at times so that you don't have to face the reality of your own situation.
4) How does spreading rumors feel - is it freeing to you or do you just come away with a bad feeling when you tell people things that you don't even know. Is it about feeling powerful? Are you more enlightened because you spread rumors about things that were not truth and that you don't know about?
5) Why is my life and my decisions any of your business?

I have a brother in law, whom I love. He was recently in town. I asked if he wanted to get together. After a nineteen year relationship his response was "I don't know what we'd talk about...maybe next time." It was indicative of a pattern I've witnessed. In these times, it's easier to talk behind someone's back than to confront them with questions or just to sit down and talk. It's easier to just skip away from a long relationship rather than have a difficult discussion, which would allow one to decide whether one wants to end a friendship. Is this treating others as human beings?

I blame no one. Nor am I a victim. I've made mistakes over the past six months - and I would love to do some things differently. But what would you expect from an ass? This experience has taken me off a pedestal within parts of my family. It has knocked me off a pedestal with many friends who still won't talk to either me or the woman I love because they have judged us, as if they know anything of the truth anyway!

Fergie's gift last night was that she provided me with the opportunity to get this off my chest. I needed to share this. I have no one to please, anymore. I am just an ass walking around this earth in my own place of joy, living my life the way I want without worrying about what other people think of me. I highly encourage people to look at the pedestals they may be on, or what pedestals they put others on. And knock it off. And just be who you are. Free. Unencumbered.

It was obvious last night that Fergie had a similar experience in her life, and it's obvious that she doesn't care anymore what anyone thinks of her. She's just an ass doing her thing (and boy was she shaking hers last night) and I leave her to that, knowing that she has a gift of a wonderful voice and wisdom to share. Wisdom that is very relevant for young girls and also for aging men.

Fergie, I do not put you on my pedestal and yet I'm grateful for your energy and voice last night as I was digesting cheese curds and fried pickles. You enabled me the freedom to finally write some of the things I feel. And not give a damn what anyone says about them. I don't get the sense that you are here to make people comfortable, and I join you on that stage.

August 3, 2007

Bridges

I live about five miles from the 35W bridge that collapsed this week in Minneapolis. I was not here at the time but was shocked, concerned, grieving, wondering from up in northern Minnesota. My heart like so many around the world goes out to all of those families involved. My community will be impacted by this for years - far past when the CNN cameras find another story to cover around the clock.

When the first wave of emotion was past I started to wonder about bridges. A major bridge collapsed in the Heartland of America. It is tragic. And I wonder if there is a sign for us all in this. Tragedies like this offer us times to reflect, and society to ask big questions. After September 11, we had perhaps one of the greatest opportunities in our history to create positive change in our world. And the world was behind us. We chose instead a path that led to a war, and the world - which was so behind us after the towers went down - instead has less respect for our great nation than perhaps they have ever had. We lost some of our ability to truly lead the world. And now, our own bridges are falling. We are a country with the greatest resources of any country in the modern era - and we are spending a significant per centage of our assets on war machines and on wars in Afganistan and Iraq. We are so deeply in debt. And our own infrastructure is collapsing.

What choices are we making that are in the best interests of a peaceful, safe world? What are we doing to lift ourselves as a race to a higher plane, a planet of peace. We are not building enough bridges of peace in this world, and now our own bridges are collapsing in front of our eyes as we spend our assets and watch innocent Iraqis die and our own soldiers coming home in body bags.

In Minnesota, we have choices to make. On the day after the bridge collapsed, I heard a news story that we were already lining up lawsuits. Are we going to focus on blame, or are we going to focus our energy on finding out why this happened and ensure it never happens again? Can we ask the question beyond whether our roads are safe and try to make our entire state a safer place - for children, for battered women, for the homeless, for our environment.

What bridges can we build? Perhaps there is a gift given amidst the terrible loss. The universe does create opportunities for us as humanity to look at bigger questions. Tsnumanis, hurricanes, buildings collapsing, volcanoes, diseases, and even bridges collapsing. We can unite on earth to create anything we want - we are capable of creating any change on this planet as we are capable of destroying it.

My hope is that here in Minnesota we can build new bridges - between cultures, between us and this precious environment, and most importantly, bridges to our own hearts. To see internally what bridges are collapsing. To see societally what bridges are collapsing.
I pray that our leaders can utilize this as an opportunity for positive change. I pray that we as citizens demand that our leaders make positive changes. I pray that each of us would have the courage to look within ourselves to see the bridges we can build to a more peaceful life.

July 18, 2007

Vision For Humanity

I recently went to hear an incredible man with an incredible vision. Malcolm Cohan, an Australian - was speaking about his work helping people to create their own vision videos. Malcomb's vision is about reducing negativity on the planet, and his focus is helping and encouraging people to create their own vision stories through video. It's pretty simple - people around the world are beginning to post videos of their vision for their lives.

Our thoughts, our hopes, and our intentions will manifest themselves in our lives if we are open to receive. It happens to me all the time. Setting our intentions through journaling, through collages or other means creates our reality - Malcomb's experience is that when we do this through video, we are focused to really pay attention to what we are asking for - and allowing us to really create, play back what those intentions are for our lives. And setting it out there so that the Universe can respond. It works. It may not work in the way we think it will work - and we can neither control how it happens or what will change in our lives when it does happen. We may face choices of needing to be complete with some things in our lives in order to live out our dreams.

I really encourage people to set intentions - to ask the universe what we want in our lives. And then get out of the way and allow it to happen in its own unique timing. Trust, believe. But give up control.

As a visionary, I can see the type of planetary change we can make by adding our own unique hopes and desires through our own vision videos. When millions of people are telling their own future stories, dreams, aspirations through videos that all can see, we are adding a tremendous positive force for the future of Earth. You can create your own story, tell your own future. My video will be coming soon.
Check out Malcolm's site at www.malcolmcohan.com

March 24th

What's Grabbing Ahold of your Sweet Ass?

A couple of days ago I posted a poem by Hafiz. I found another one which really was short, sweet, and hit to a core concept. As a Vision Coach, it is one of my intentions to ask questions that help people to understand their path of joy in life. What is the work that will bring us joy? What are the decisions or changes one needs to make to get there? What is the voice of the soul saying to remove the blocks that keep us from where God intends all of us to be - in a place of joy, happiness, gratefulness. There is no reason on this earth to be miserable. It is only us that blocks the sweet Divine path that is before us. It is conditioning, blame, shame, guilt, fear, projection that keeps us from living the life we were meant to live.

I found this poem from Hafiz which just speaks beautifully to the subject.

A HARD DECREE - by Hafiz

Last

Night

God
Posted
On the Tavern wall

A hard decree for all of love's inmates

Which read:

If your heart cannot find a joyful work

The jaws of this world
Will probably

Grab hold of your

Sweet
Ass
----------
Perhaps Hafiz is correct. If your job is not bringing you joy, something in this world may have grabbed you by your sweet ass. You have the power to unclench the jaws, get rid of what's gotten ahold of you, and live in a different place. Joy is not to be found, it is already here. We just need to take the blinders off to see it.

December 13

Fruit Flies and my Father

Today is the two year anniversary of my father's death. And I find myself celebrating and grateful for him - as I have learned, he's not really gone at all - I experience him all the time. His death was one of the great gifts of my life. As was his life.

I've learned that people who have lost love ones sometimes experience their presence in interesting ways - through nature, birds, dreams, actually seeing them, flowers, coincidences... the realm of spirit beyond the human body is fascinating, comforting, and wonderful. My dad has chosen a unique way of making his presence felt to me and increasingly to members of my family. Through fruit flies.

About six months after he died, I began seeing one fruit fly at various times around the house. Perhaps it was at times when I was thinking about him - I don't know how I made the connection - but once I did, I told my wife and kids. My wife started seeing them to, and the kids reported the same. Once, in fact, my son saw one on the kitchen table and squished it and then was in horror that he'd killed the fruit fly - fortunately, it flew away. Then the fruit flies started taking the show on the road. I began seeing them with some of my friends, at coffee shops, restaurants. It was always one fruit fly. I was with one of my best friends who was in from Cape Town and with my mother - and explaining to them my stories. Just as I was explaining this (and thinking I was crazy), my friend looked down and guess what had landed on his thumbnail?

I was at my last board meeting as Chair of the Minnesota International Center at one of the most prestigious law firms in town weeks later. As soon as I closed the meeting, I was talking to the President of the Organization (my father had also been on the board and had gotten me involved), this little fruit fly scooted right past my eyes. A few weeks later I was at home singing the song Courage which I played at my father's funeral. I saw a fruit fly. As I began playing, it landed right next to me - sat there the entire time until I was finished an flew off.

I gave a copy of the album to my friend Tim Frantzich who produced the album - he took it home and as he was picking it up to play it for the first time, he noticed a fruit fly on the cd case. I saw a fruit fly at the top of Maccu Piccu in Peru. My kids saw them on the bus home from school. My daughter reported one as she was practicing for the school play. I saw one at my Dad's high school when one of my best friends was speaking at my 25th anniversary. At lunch with my brother in law.

My mother started seeing them - at home getting ready for our family Thanksgiving trip to Arizona - she was packing games to take along (my father loved games). A fruit fly cruised by. She was with my Dad's three best friends for dinner in Vermont - a fruit fly landed on her wine glass and just stayed there. She was at one of their favorite charities recently and was given a kids book on love, and flying right above the book...you guessed it.
I stopped writing these experiences down for months because it just became commonplace. I thought my family thought I was nuts. But then my sister reported seeing one - and two nights ago she and her husband reported seeing two fruit flies at their dinner table.

What does all this mean?

Who cares?

What I take from it, is that the Universe has a sense of humor, and so did (does) my father. Our loved ones don't leave us. They are just not here in the physical form which we experience. It also means that if we pay attention and be present to circumstance and synchonicity, funny things happen. Just at the right time. It's so easy to miss these things - what possible relevance does a fruit fly have to me? Now I realize every living creature has relevance to me, because we are all One in the end.

Do you have a story like this? I was talking to a friend of mine who lost her father last week. She told me some amazing things about his visits to other places before he died. He lucidly reported seeing relatives that had passed away years ago - she explained to me that she was sharing it with me because I was one of the few people that would understand. That made me sad - if you have a story like this, share it! It will touch other people. Even if they think you are crazy, in some way it will open them to the realms of possibilities beyond our understanding. Heck, nothing could be crazier than seeing fruit flies and relating them in some ways to my father's presence in my life. Just tell them about my crazy story first, and yours may seem a little less crazy than mine. And just maybe, they'll believe you. If not, send me an e-mail at charliehartwell@mac.com - I'll believe you!

To my father, who I adore, who loves me beyond my ability to understand, I honor you on this day and I thank you John Hartwell for your presence in my life. I could not have come up with the fruit fly thing - thank you for your creativity and humor.

December 7

HOLIDAY GIFTS AND YOUR GIFTS

It's the holiday season, an appropriate time to talk about gifts. Many people are out shopping for them. However, it seems a worthy time to ask not what you are giving this holiday season but what you ARE. What are your gifts to the world?

Putting the pocketbook away and finding and claiming your own gifts can be much more difficult than shopping for others.

We're not used to talking about our gifts openly; someone has told us that it is egotistical to claim them. It's really hard to be honest with ourselves and to live in our own treasure. We're used to wrapping presents for others but keeping our own Divine gifts wrapped in ourselves.

Take me for an example. Several years ago one of my close friends called me a visionary. When she said that, it triggered a deep desire to run and hide. That was too big for me. If I claimed that, it would be seen as egotistical. It was so uncomfortable to hear her say that. The terrifying question wasn't "What if I'm not a visionary?" but "What if I am?" It was exceedingly difficult to get the words "I am a visionary" out of my mouth - for months.
Finally, in a place of owning this visionary, there was another insight. At a lunch meeting with a corporate recruiter, I claimed this visionary. He was very uncomfortable with my owning it. His point of view was that it was not correct to claim this gift - it was only if other people called me visionary that I actually was one. Leaving that meeting and pondering his comment deeply, there was a realization that my truth was different than his. My truth was that it was time to live in and claim my gifts and not have any expectations that others would agree with me. The great Master once said something to the effect that "What good is it if you hide your lamp under a bed stand?" Was it for others to take my light from underneath that table so that it could shine or was it my responsibility?

Slowly, I began to understand that hiding my own gifts was not for the highest good for myself or the world. It was hiding my own light - as the Master spoke about long ago. My own light IS; hiding it did no one any good.
It is a vulnerable place for many to live in this place of claiming what we already are. As I help others to bring their gifts out from underneath their own bed stand, there is deep fear and reluctance to even talk about it. One of my clients (such an incredible person) was looking to make changes in her career. We explored possibilities and I asked her to tell me what she felt her gifts were. Her response was "I am a Catholic. We don't speak about our gifts." My heart felt for her. Who was she not to live in the gifts that she is? This incredible Divine soul - not able to be what she already is.

What if we all were living in and claiming our gifts - just being these treasures to the world? Not from a place of ego and trying to impress people (we do that pretty well) but from a place of authenticity. What if we have multiple gifts? And lived in and claimed all of them?

However difficult that is - today it seems appropriate to tell the world what my gifts are. To just be honest. In that honesty perhaps others can have a greater permission to sit in their own gifts and live them. We are all Divine gifts - children of God. How can we not be and live what we are?

Being seen is not always comfortable - even as I write this there is a part of me asking if there's something more productive I could be doing with my time this morning - like going and wrapping Christmas presents. This is not learned behavior. At the same time, as they are stated it's not important that anyone agree with me. Nor is it important that other people call me these things. It is not my goal to be known as these, it is my intention to live these gifts with this one precious life that I was given. I choose to own that responsibility - and when I do it is a place of wonder and joy.

In my work, I see others with great gifts that I do not have - and I marvel at how wonderful it is that every one of us brings wonderful, Divine gifts to our collective experience. My gifts are no more important than theirs. How wonderful that we all bring our own unique gifts here.

Here are some of my gifts. I keep wanting to claim that I'm a great hockey player, but as I continue to find on Wednesday mornings as I play against younger guys who played Division One hockey in college, I can only claim that I'm an avid hockey player. Not a good one - but getting better.

I am a visionary
I have the ability to be a guide and help for others to uncover ways of bringing their gifts to the world
I am gifted at seeing how ideas can be brought to reality
I am connected to Christ Consciousness and share that with the world
There is much wisdom within me
I am a natural leader
I am a trustworthy friend
I am a great collaborator with others
I connect deeply with nature
I am in a deep place of self-love - in being that I am in a deep place of loving others - loving All

What are your gifts? It is my hope that we can all claim our gifts and then use those gifts to create a better and healthier planet.

Happy Holidays

December 1

What's the answer to Iraq?

Last week, I was in a conversation of whether we should get out of Iraq or whether we should stay. There was no firm answer by my relatives who were debating the issue over Thanksgiving dinner. The path forward did not seem clear to them. And to be honest, I thought the answer was in itself somewhat irrelevant because I don't think the right question was being asked.

The question is not whether we stay or get out of Iraq. Certainly it is important. I honor those in different armies who are trying to promote peace and stability in Iraq. I have such compassion for the Iraqi people who are living in what NBC now describes as a Civil War.

But it seems the greater question for the human race is how is it that we will evolve to where we do not need to have war anymore. This is the question that is not stirring enough debate. We are no longer in a place where conquering land or resources is tolerable. We live increasingly in a world that is becoming one - and living with technology that can destroy us all. We have to progress where bombs are no longer the answer to our problems. We need to focus on how we can live with each other, respect each other, tolerate and honor different ways of thinking.

We will either evolve to a point where our global leaders, and those that elect or support them will say no more war, or we will face extinction at some point. We are evolving to a point where more and more nations can destroy each other with nuclear arms. Our answer seems to be to outdo the other so that our weapons are more and more sophisticated than the other. Truly, is this security or does it put all of us at a greater risk of being destroyed by what we have created. Either in an accident, terrorist attacks, or nations using these weapons against one another. We are very creative - we know how to continue to build better and more powerful weapons. But the issue seems to be whether we are more and more creative as to how we solve our problems in a peaceful way.

To have peace with the world, we must first have peace with ourselves. Perhaps it is more difficult for us to have peace within ourselves than it is to have peace with others - but one does lead to another. When we truly have peace with ourselves, how could we spend hundreds of millions of dollars on new weapons systems when our sisters and brothers around the world are starving? It is not possible.

In the tradition I grew up with, we followed a Master who preached peace and love. Above all else, that was his message. Love one another. Yet, it seems that message has been lost even by those within our country who claim to follow the faith and teaching of that Master. We hate our enemies. And war with them. And seek both economic and military power over them.

Perhaps the weapons of mass destruction that we never found in Iraq are actually to be found in our own hearts. Maybe we need to look deeply at the part of us that would make war. Perhaps the answer is to get rid of those weapons of mass destruction so that we could, 200 years from now, look back and wonder why our species ever considered building a weapon that could destroy millions in the blink of an eye. We are all Children of God. And God is Love. So how can we consider building a weapon that could destroy millions of our own, or wipe our entire species from the earth? How could we invade another country leading to the death of hundreds of thousands?

I pray for Peace in Iraq. I hope we can remove our troops and that the country can one day be at peace with itself. But even more strongly, I pray that we can remove from ourselves the consideration that war is ever an option for us in the future. We are capable of doing that. It is within us.

October 19

Charlie announces his new career as a Vision Coach - Call the A.P.

I used to be in the business of sending out press releases to announce new product launches, new expeditions, great stories. In fact, my great friend Stan Oleson (who actually designed this web site and helps to post these updates) and I got into a huge debate when Ann Bancroft and Liv Arnesen completed their expedition across Antarctica in 2001. I had heard by satellite phone that they had arrived at the end point, but it had not been confirmed by other sources. I very much wanted to call the Associated Press - who was waiting to hear from us so they could be the first to tell the news to the world. Stan thought I was ridiculous to call the A.P. because we hadn't heard from Ann and Liv that they had arrived in McMurdo Sound where they were to meet the ship that would take them to Australia (where Stan would be meeting them with a Fosters beer in his hand). Stan is a combination of a wise Buddhist Monk, a curmudgeonly lawyer (that side doesn't come out much), a Sage, a creative writer and designer, and a wonderful human being wrapped into one (and a darn good bocce player). That night, Stan was a curmudgeon and I wanted to call the A.P. - at the time I was the boss so I just called the A.P. We argue to this day about what are the facts of the story and who was right.

Now I'm announcing a new career path, and I'm definitely not wanting to call the A.P. But I am as excited (without all the adrenaline) about what is next as I was about Ann and Liv safely making it across the frozen continent.
I have been a Vision Coach for years without knowing it, knowing what to call it, or how to describe it. I am still limited by words to describe my gift and how I use it to help people to develop, understand, and implement the vision for their life, career, or organization.

Now I am claiming this gift and gently telling people about my new practice. Instead of calling the A.P., it is my intention that the universe will have the A.P. call me (the Appropriate People) - or that the appropriate people will tell their friends to meet with me, either by phone or in person.

It is my intention to help individuals and organizations in whatever place they exist on the scale of bringing a vision to fruition, something I call "The Vision Continuum). A range of services for clients include helping to

- Identify/define a vision
- Ideate/understand what is possible
- Provide knowledge or resources on how to implement the dream
- Ensuring major stakeholders understand and embrace the vision
- Understand how to better package and sell the vision
- Discuss career choices that can help move towards attainment
- Be a resource – providing support and reinforcement on the path

I offer the wisdom of experience from working in 11 different industries, being on the board of directors of organizations in five other industries. That combines with the education of an undergraduate degree from Brown University and a Harvard M.B.A. as well as an ability to deeply LISTEN to a client. Added to that is my intuitive senses. I can't describe those. But truly, it is the reason why I am a Vision Coach. People don't come to me just for my words, it is just part of what I offer. People come because I offer a place to hear them at a deep level, because they can sense that I believe deeply in their abilities, because I can hold a container for them to dig into their own place to find the answers to questions posed. I don't have any answers. I have questions. And in the space of partnership that we hold during a meeting, I support their finding out how to get to their vision.

When I meet with clients, I am in such a space of joy. It is not work, it is my work and my joy. It is who I am. It is how I am here to be of assistance to the people who are drawn to me.

So this is my version of "Calling the A.P." Unfortunately, this time Stan is the boss because my announcement won't get posted without his help. I know he won't agree with my version of what happened on Antarctica, but I'm asking him to go with it. He might put a counter blog with his version of the events on his blog http://www.natsnoselo.blogspot.com/ (which is worth reading) I do want to publicly thank him for the work he's done on this web site.

If you're interested in having me as a vision coach - you don't need to call the A.P. - you can just e-mail me at charliehartwell@mac.com or call me at 612 860-7964.

Charlie Hartwell
Vision Coach
612 860-7964

Helping individuals who are seeking guidance in developing, understanding, or implementing their personal, professional, or organizational vision.

 

October 11

Nuclear Blame Game

I am struck today by humanity's continued need and desire to blame each other. It is so ingrained in humanity - and it is time for us to find a new way (or perhaps it is a very old way).

Let's see - the country which exploded the only nuclear bomb ever above ground is now blaming the North Koreans. Making the North Koreans wrong when now many countries on earth have nuclear technology. The blame game. North Korea - evil. The United States - saintly. We right, they wrong. Our making them wrong and calling them evil - how does that help humanity?

The earth has discovered nuclear technology and it is spreading at a rapid rate - what we do about it matters. It matters for our children. I do not fear a nuclear bomb going off - if it is meant to go off, it will. If we blow ourselves up - we will. The universe will go on and in a blip of an eye as far as time goes, cells (if meant to be) will start evolving again on earth. Life goes on, here, there, in places seen and unseen.

What disturbs me isn't that North Korea has a bomb. What disturbs me is that we can't resolve our problems and we have no path to real peace on earth. What is problematic is that the most powerful country on earth has no plan to reduce the use of nuclear technology nor seemingly the amount we spend on deadly technology. Heck, we can't even lead on an environmental agreement that most countries on earth desired - Kyoto. We spend a great per cent of our GDP on war technology and our politicians laugh at and haven't ever voted on establishing a Department of Peace.

Pakistan has it. The Brits have it. China has it. Japan I'm sure has it. Russia has it. India likely has it. North Korea now has it. Israel has it. Iran's going to have it. Others will soon haveit and I'm sure I'm missing some. So we've got this thing - and it's pretty destructive. And maybe we are MEANT by God to have this, because it's not a nuclear test we need worry about, but the human test we need to worry about. How do we ensure this technology is never used again like WE, the United States, used on Japan?

I loved watching Star Trek as a kid. I remember Spock relating to Captain Kirk a story about how once we humans we in the nuclear age (a dark point of human existence if I recall correctly) - and in Star Trek we got past that point and the Earth lived in peace. We need new leadership that is resolved to lead the Earth to peace. To get to the point where we can evolve so perhaps we too can go out in space- united as a people vs. divided as nations. War isn't going to get us there. Nuclear technology isn't going to get us there. Peace and love and respect of our neighbors WILL get us there. And a firm will to disarm, to take risks for peace vs. escalating our risks of war.

I say to the collective will of humanity - peace, love, harmony, respect, compassion. Let me say it more loudly - PEACE, LOVE, HARMONY, RESPECT, COMPASSION. These are all so much more powerful than nuclear bombs, which bring fear, destruction, death, pain, and suffering. They are more powerful than a war in Iraq in which 600,000 Iraqis have died.

Let us find a way to get past this nuclear blame game, and look to the future with a firm commitment to peace. To reducing the amount of guns we buy and investing ourselves in living in harmony with each other despite our differences. Why can't we turn our eyes from war on Iraq to war on hunger, poverty, disease? We could eradicate all of these if we had the will. Instead we are focused on nuclear technology, which can eradicate all of US.

 

August 2

Dream Answered

If you read the last entry, I referred to a dream I had about _____ Lake, this place where my buddies and I have gone fishing for 27 years. I just returned from the trip - which was by all accounts again an incredible experience. It was not particularly good for me personally in the gambling department - I lost my shirt in gin rummy, fishing contests, Yahtzee, golf (it's a card game).

I never judge the trip by how well I fish. People ask "How was the fishing?" and the true response it "It doesn't matter."

I had an intention that my dream would be answered during this trip. My dream of how I get up to the lake and see there are people all over, that the place is developed. It's a recurring dream and I know until I understand the message, it will keep happening.

The last night of the trip I was sitting down on the dock. Alone. I was gazing up at the sky and noticed these flashing lights. Not heat lightning, not lightning, not northern lights. My friend Steve came down to the dock. We started chatting about life. Normally, we have a wonderful discussion the last night of the trip, going late until the morning.

Steve was beginning to see the lights as well. We were in a pretty intense discussion, but he finally asked me "Do you see the little circular spot in these lights after they flash?" It was so strange what we were seeing that both of us needed to just confirm it with each other. Around that time we heard a WHAM in the water - the big splash of what had to have been a beaver tail. However, after five days we hadn't seen a beaver. We always see beavers at _____ Lake. I am convinced it was a message to us - to pay attention. We continued to look at the sky - and were just amazed by what we saw. These flashes of light - and at the center were these circles.

I am currently not "a seer." I have many friends who see people, energy, angels in other dimensions. I do not have that gift. But I believe that for my friend Steve and I, the universe was telling us that we are surrounded by others. We are not alone. Each of those flashing lights of energy was another spirit that we know that was sending us a message that answered our dream. We are supported, loved, guided, and assisted by many others. And while I may not be able to directly see into other dimensions, these beings were able to find a way to show themselves in this dimension. It was a gift.

At 2:00 a.m. it was time to call it quits. But there was one more small sign for us - we reached the cabin door to find a dragonfly. One would expect moths or flies to be trying to get to the light inside the cabin, but this dragonfly was the only bug on the screen. It was very adamant that it wanted to get in the cabin. Dragonflies are the symbol of transformation - and I believe this evening ended on a perfect note. The universe was asking us to allow transformation into our lives. It wanted us to open the doors that we keep lock so that we can find what is truly inside us.

I honor my friend _____ Lake, who over the years has provided me with so many wonderful memories, messages, and inspiration. And for helping this year to finally solve this dream I've been having for years.

July 20

The Middle East

A guy once asked me a question - and my answer cost me a job.

In my youth, I worked as an archaeologist in Jerusalem. After college, I was interviewing for jobs in New York with commercial banks. I had stuck my experience in Jerusalem way down at the bottom of my resume (since I'd done it as a 9th grader). But I thought it made me more worldly. No one ever asked me about it. Until this Senior Vice President at J.P. Morgan asked me a profound question: "How would you solve the ongoing crisis in Israel." This was 20 years ago.

I was dumbstruck. I hemmed and hawed. I had studied the subject a lot. There seemed no answers. I finally had to say, "I don't have any solutions that seem workable. This has gone on so long - there does not seem to be an answer."

I didn't get the job.

Fortunately, I did get a job at another bank and spent two years in New York.

Unfortunately, the problem in Israel and Palestine still exists - as it has for centuries. There is still political crisis in Israel, and in the West Bank and as we read it has expanded back to Lebanon. Presidents have staked careers trying to solve it. Others have avoided getting too immeshed in it because they don't want to take political risk. People are still killed almost daily in either Israel or the West Bank.

I'm now led to ask the same question. And to think of how we can begin to build a more peaceful world. So how could this situation that spans centuries be resolved? My answers will seem simplistic, because the details of a negotiated settlement seem so complex that it seemed impossible to solve them. Perhaps the solutions ARE more simple than we have made them for so long.

1) The easiest way for it to be resolved is to take 10 Israeli kids under the age of 10 years old, put them in a room with 10 Palestinian children, and ask them to find peace. And to declare by law that the governments of both countries would abide by what they said. Yes, the children could lead this process to peace. Because they have not yet been programmed with the hatred that is created by all of the memories, stories of the past - all the horrors and blame on both sides, and the questions of who's right and who's wrong. The kids could solve the Israeli-Palestinian conflict. But who would ever listen to a bunch of ten year old kids?

2) It will solve itself when the desire for peace and love is stronger than war and hatred. If this could ever happen, then perhaps it would be a model for the whole world and could lead to actual global peace. How many hundreds, thousands, tens of thousands must die before people say, enough. And just work it out.

3) Peace would occur much more quickly if religions could come together and respect each other. To have the Jewish community revel in the joy of Ramadan even though they don't participate in the festivities would do wonders for peace. Or for the Muslims to honor Roshashana - and celebrate that this holiday brings the Jewish faith closer to the Divine. Or even for the Christians in the West to have a deeper respect for the Muslim faith. Our extremists argue that the Muslim extremists are wrong. What if no one is right, and no one is wrong, and if all these faiths bring people closer to God? For ages, we have fought for territory so we can convert others to our way of thinking. If we got to that place of respect for each other, and realized that the God of all faiths is a God of Love, perhaps we would no longer need to kill each other over who is right and who is wrong. What if the leaders of all faiths made this a priority - to actually learn about and to deeply respect and honor the other religions?

4) This will sound the oddest of my solutions. But if we began truly loving ourselves - truly, deeply, loving ourselves, not only the Middle East crisis, but all wars on this planet would cease. For when we are in a state of true, deep love for ourselves, we can no longer tolerate destruction of others. We all become Ghandi. We all become Mother Theresa. We all become Martin Luther King. And we can no longer solve our problems with guns. If we do not blame others for wars but just find peace within ourselves, all wars will cease.

5) I recently wrote a piece about past lives. If enough Israelis realized that they were Muslims in other lives, why would they kill Muslims? If Sunni's living today found that in another life they were a Shiite, perhaps they would not be as interested in conflict with another sect. My truth is that we are not what we think. Those living a Christian life today are, at the core, not Christians. We are all one - we are all children of a Higher Power. When we realize we are all one, we may stop trying to kill each other.

I am no longer looking for a job at J.P. Morgan. But had I had spoken these words 20 years ago, I know I would have been offered a job. Because I had the job up until the point when that man asked me the question "How would you solve the Middle East process?" And I had no answers. I have changed, and while my answers may make no sense to some, they are answers. When the world changes and says "We must find answers so that we can live in harmony together as a global community," we will have peace. As a species, we are either much closer to finding these solutions than we were 20 years ago, or we are much farther away. I question if we can continue as a species if we do not begin to solve these problems over the next years. Our methods of destruction are increasingly getting more sophisticated and lethal to our earth, but our methods of peaceful conflict resolution do not seem to be keeping up.